Hurry up and Weight!

Well, it is Saturday, September 6 and my days are settling into to hurry up and wait, only in Kensley's case it is hurry up and weight, because each day I hold my breath until I weigh her again. I did not get to blog yesterday because my Internet connection was down, but I deeply appreciate all of you who are keeping up with Kensley and myself through this blog. You are wonderful and your love and support, as always, raise me up. For those of you who know me, I love the written word, which is why Paul is my favorite Bible writer and Romans is my favorite book of the Bible. Through out this whole journey I have received beautiful notes and cards of encouragement. I thank God for each one of them and I thank those who took the time to place a little of their heart into those cards and notes.

Kensley is up to 9 pounds and 4 ounces. We go to the doctor on Tuesday (Labs on Monday) and I am beginning to feel myself become anxious. Yeah, I know the Bible tells us to be anxious for nothing but in all things with prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God Philippians 4:6. That is one of those verses that are easier read than done. I find myself often waiting for the other shoe to drop. That is how this story has gone. That other shoe just kept on coming...

First I am 34 weeks pregnant and Kensley is diagnosed with a diaphragmatic hernia. Tears and devastation ensued. Then the doctors come back and say, Hey we were wrong! It is a better diagnosis of pulmonary sequestration. Ok, I am feeling better, BUT...they were wrong. Kensley is induced at 37 weeks and 6 days. She is screaming and pink and perfect. They take her to the nursery and come back to me saying we think she has both a diaphragmatic hernia and a pulmonary sequestration. Greater devastation sets in. Because she was not given a very good chance. Surgery immediately. At the end of the surgery, our very competent surgeon, Dr. McGill comes out to say, It was the best type of hernia you could have-very small and easy to repair. A couple of weeks in the NICU and she should be fine. Wrong again. Her belly started swelling and swelling. Two days later Dr. McGill does exploratory surgery expecting to find nothing more than a ruptured capillary. Wrong! They missed the double bubble sign on the x-ray that would indicate a mal-rotation of the intestine, and the swelling was caused by dying intestines that no longer received blood supply. Yes, the other shoe just keep on coming!

I remember thinking that I just couldn't take anymore. I couldn't cry anymore. I couldn't hurt any more. I couldn't talk. I just couldn't, but then I talked to one of the many blessing that have entered my life during all of this... Tina. Tina is a mom and a teacher and one of my angels. She has a son who was born premature and soon after had to have a intestine resection (removal of intestine). Eric is now 8, handsome, playful and so smart with no symptoms of Short Bowel or Short Gut(the chronic condition that occurs after a intestinal resection). She told me of a time that she was driving to the hospital while Eric was still in NICU (and the doctors had told her that he would not come home unless under hospice care). She said that she just screamed at God and told him that she hated His plan and that she did not want to do this. That was when she heard that still small voice that often comes to us..."Do you think I wanted to go to the cross, but I did it because I love you" The answer is simple..No, Jesus did not WANT to go to the cross. He prayed so hard in the garden that blood appeared. He asked God if there was any other way, BUT he said "if this is your will..." WOW! I don't understand God's plan sometimes and I never will on this side, but I TRUST HIM. AND even though I may sit here and begin to worry, I remember those words and the wisdom of a Mom who made it through this tunnel. So as I hurry up and wait, I praise the Lord for Kensley, and J. and Kaydee and Cooper and my Mom and My Mom-in-law and Dad-in-Law and my friends and for the doctors and the ability to share this with you and all the love and support we have received. Then I pray for Kensley and all of you. Hugs from Heaven, Tana

Prayer Requests:
Please continue to pray for Kensley as her stools have become more liquid and this is not good. Also, please pray for little Jake, a sweet one year old baby who is in desperate need of a heart transplant. He is in Texas Children's in Houston fighting an infection. He must be infection free to receive a transplant, and he needs a transplant to survive. Pray for his family. Another request is prayer for a sweet little fella named Caed. He is five a wonderful little boy who ironicly has lost about as much intestine as Kensley due to malrotation. He has been suffering with some strange complications lately and I ask that everyone pray that he is able to come to the specialist in Nebraska and get the help he needs.